Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Introspection II




Who are you?

Be who you are and love yourself while u are at it.
Logical...makes sense, right?
It's something i struggle with.........a lot.

There's a desire to be more than i am, which in a way is a good thing cos it paves the way for growth and prevents complacence.
Then there's the feeling of not being good enough. Broken............ never damaged, but needing fixing.
I should be more extroverted and out going.
I should like partying and going out.
I should want to dress sexy and show off my body.
I should be more into fashion and be more "girly".
I should want to wear make-up and act my age.
I should look like a woman instead of a little girl.
I should be more submissive and domesticated
I should be less "Westernized" and more Nigerian
I should accept that it's my duty as a Nigerian woman to serve a man
I should be really looking forward to getting married and being someone's wife.

But i'm not any of those things. Where do i draw the line between wanting to be a better person and not feeling good enough.

Love yourself, love yourself, love yourself!
I can honestly say that i don't love myself. Most times, i don't even like myself. Maybe i am a defeated perfectionist.
You would think i should be in love with myself with the number of people who love and like me. People tell me all these things about myself. I believe them because intellectually i know these things, but it's not good enough. It has to come from within.

A lot of healing needs to take place. I need to open my hands in order to be able to receive and at the same time let go of old and redundant baggage.

I understand that before i can truly love anybody in the purest sense of that word, or let anyone love me, I must love myself. In order to love myself, i have to accept myself as an imperfect human. I'm not God so it's okay to make mistakes. What matters more than the mistakes we make are the lessons we learn from them. So i should learn my lessons instead of internalizing stuff and thinking i'm the worst person that ever walked the face of this planet (i really don't think that).

So here i am......ready to start loving myself. I think i'm cool people, so it shouldn't be that hard :D

I wonder where this came from, i really came here to blog about the crumpets i had for breakfast. I must be british in my next life :) I still want a British accent but i have accepted that it's not going to happen in this life time. Sucks for me :(

Monday, September 27, 2010

Tired!


You know u r really tired when u start drooling before you actually fall asleep! Ewww! So lab ended at 4pm and we had anatomy tutorials at 5pm that i wanted to attend. So i got a nerd room, settled down to eat my sandwich and tried to study before the tutuorial....i was so tired that after eating that i decided to take a nap. It was about 4.30p at that time. So i put my head on the table, and before u can say Jack Robinson, i was drooling on the table. I say this one wey i don dey drool and i never even sleep, if i come sleep nko? Wetin i go do? So i just respected myself and stayed awake. I kept drifting off throughout the tutorial but i made it to the end. I think i had like 3 hrs of sleep yesterday. My eyes started clouding over during anatomy lab and my lab members still insisted that i was the best person to dissect the arteries out of the neck. Apparently, i should be a pathologist? Really? Sleep dey catch me una dey say i sabi cut dead body, na that one dey do me now?

I'm so tired though but i spent the last hour talking on the phone instead of sleeping so i have to pay for it now. I hate anatomy.......So sick of memorizing stuff. I have fallen in love with Rihanna's rude boy cos apparently it's perfect for memorizing anatomy stuff.... for me o! Try at ur own risk. I still think the video sucks, well parts of it anyway.

Got some sad news today. My younger sister's friend passed away. Really sad. May her soul rest in peace.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Ask me anything

I thought it would be nice to make my blog a little more interactive, so i got a formspring account. So if you've got a question for me, go ahead and ask. Don't be shy. :)

Party Time

Yesterday, i had the most fun i have had in med school, in fact the most fun i've had this year. Period. It was my friend's birthday on the 21st and we had a get together yesterday. I made the Jollof rice. It wasn't just any old jollof rice, i managed to pull off the "party" rice. My mom usually makes it for our birthdays. I had no idea how she did it, i know knew it tasted different and way better. I made a phone call to mommy dearest and well, the big secret really is more tomatoes. It came out really nice and was on point, even though i couldn't eat any (besides the tasting to see if it was okay) cos i can't have tomatoes amongst a million other things.

The get together was mostly Africans, all med students. There were 8 Nigerians, 1 Cameroonian, 1 Ghanaian, 1 sierra leonian and 2 African Americans. There was a lot of talking loudly (you know how we are), laughter, talking about how even if we (the chics) are going to be doctors we still want rich men, cos our money is our money, and his money is our money. It was good fun. Didn't get any studying done, of course. One of the guys had a polaroid camera and we took some pictures. I thot it was pretty cool. I might post some pictures later.

In other news, I am in a reverse love triangle, or as i like to call it, the unlove triangle. Long story short, I started talking to Mr. A to get over Mr. B, now i'm back talking to Mr. B to get over Mr. A. Yeah, crazy right. I'm still on a love break (whatever that means), but i'm trying to get by, so i talk. I have been told on more than one occasion that i lead guys on. Hey! To me i'm just talking. I don't see why i have to decisively tell you yes or no, when
  1. I like the attention
  2. I'm not sure
  3. I don't want to hurt your feelings *cough*
  4. I might be partially interested
  5. You are good looking
Bite me. You are a grown man, you should be able to handle it abi? LOL...ok, i'm not a hundred percent serious, but i know i do it, it's not just consciously. I'm not that mean, but besides i do like that attention sha!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Today



I have to write this down for posterity: For the first time in my life, i forgot to brush my teeth before going out the house. Worst of all, i was going to anatomy lab where i am in close proximity with the 4 guys in my group. What's even worse is that we are doing the head and neck and we are all gathered around the head. Best believe i was on mute the whole time. There are many things i wanted to say but couldn't or refused to. If i absolutely had to talk, which i did, i made sure i was as far away as possible without being obvious. It was an uncomfortable hour and a half. I was 30 mins late to lab in the first place.

When i jumped in the shower, i remember thinking i hadn't brushed my teeth. This was around past 1 and lab starts at 2pm. Got out the shower and decided to do some amebo on skype. By the time i talked the one wey no concern me finish, it was almost two, so i grabbed my bag and left the house. Half way to school, i realized i hadn't brushed, and that my friends is how my day began. I've been home for 3 hrs and i still haven't brushed. I guess i'm just being nasty today.

P.S. Life is ironic and i think my life is especially ironic these days. It's very interesting. I wish i could share, but................ no!

That's all folks. Let's hope i remember to put on clothes tomorrow.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Stuff

My bruised and battered heart

I am paralyzed by the amount of school work i have to do. Just for today's lecture alone, i have 95 power point slides to go through for human development and 18 densely packed pages of biochem notes that i have to go through tonight unless i will be behind. The previous lectures from last week and yesterday that i have gone through, i still need to go over, so i don't forget. I have tons of information swimming in my head that have not yet been consolidated.  Anatomy, cranial nerves OMG! Plus all the other stuff. In fact, the cranial nerves are not so bad, compared to all those other innervation pathways. I'm exhausted but too scared to take a nap cos i KNOW i will not wake up until tomorrow. Caffeine....how i miss thee!

Now that i have written another chapter in my personal book of lamentations, i shall take my leave of you and go and study! Farewell.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Where am I and what am i doing here?

Mood: Tired and hungry
I am so tired! My legs hurt from sitting down most of the day. I took a break in the early afternoon and watched Why did i get married too? I know i am months behind (don't judge me :) but what in the name of all things good and holy was Tyler Perry thinking when he wrote that movie. Like come on, what kind of script was that. It was so weak. I'm glad i stole snuck the movie from my sister instead of buying it. I would have been so pissed if i spent money on that crap of a story line.
                                                                                                                                                                 
In other news, I have become a bipolar facebook addict/ deactivator. I can't tell u how many times i have deactivated my account in a week. I went back for amebo purposes, left, but can't seem to stay gone. Help!!!!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Blessings

Mood: Happy and at peace


I'm blessed!

So my impromtu visit home is about to be over. I am SO glad i came cos my brain got a chance to reset itself and i'm totally fine. I love my family. My niece is awesome. Ready to dive back into studying. I am so behind, thinking about it is frightening, so i won't think. I'll just do.

After this trip home, if i had any doubts that God exists and he's looking out for me, i no longer do. I saw God in action. I believe that my run "bad luck" is over and from now on, only good things will come my way. I managed to stress myself out over stuff but in the end God came through for me. I just need to learn to trust that God will take care of me and my life will be so much better.

Monday, September 13, 2010

The Awakening

Current mood: Tired

My sister sent me this, this morning and i really liked it. I'm still trying to digest it because it's pretty long and it's a lot of stuff. I hope someone else out there can find it meaningful, that's why i'm sharing. If you would like to be added to my bloglist, pls leave a comment. Blogger decided to erase all 200+ blogs on my blog list after i changed my url. Way to go, blogger.


The Awakening

There comes a time in your life when you finally get it ... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out "ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on." And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world from a new perspective.

..........This is your awakening.

You realize that it is time to stop hoping and waiting for something or someone to change, or for happiness safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that there aren't always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you. Then a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

So you begin making your way through the "reality of today" rather than holding out for the "promise of tomorrow." You realize that much of who you are and the way you navigate through life is, in great part, a result of all the social conditioning you've received over the course of a lifetime. And you begin to sift through all the nonsense you were taught about :

- how you should look and how much you should weigh,
- what you should wear and where you should shop,
- where you should live or what type of car you should drive,
- who you should sleep with and how you should behave,
- who you should marry and why you should stay,
- the importance of bearing children or what you owe your family,

Slowly you begin to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin re-assessing and re-defining who you are and what you really believe in. And you begin to discard the doctrines you have outgrown, or should never have practiced to begin with.

You accept the fact that you are not perfect ,and that not everyone will love appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK... they are entitled to their own views and opinions. And, you come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a "perfect 10".... Or a perfect human being for that matter... and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head or agonizing over how you compare. And, you take a long look at yourself in the mirror and you make a promise to give yourself the same unconditional love and support you give so freely to others. Then a sense of confidence is born of self-approval.

And, you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" hungry for your next fix, a new dress, another pair of shoes or looks of approval and admiration from family, friends or even strangers who pass by. Then you discover that it is truly in "giving" that we receive, and that the joy and abundance you seek grows out of the giving. And you recognize the importance of "creating" and "contributing" rather than "obtaining" and "accumulating."

And you give thanks for the simple things you've been blessed with, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about - a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, the freedom of choice and the opportunity to pursue your own dreams.

And you begin to love and to care for yourself. You stop engaging in self-destructive behaviors, including participating in dysfunctional relationships. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and exercising. And because you've learned that fatigue drains the spirit and creates doubt and fear, you give yourself permission to rest. And just as food is fuel for the body, laughter is fuel for the spirit and so you make it a point to create time for play.

Then you learn about love and relationships - how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. And you allow only the hands of a lover who truly loves and respects you to glorify you with his touch. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say, intentionally or unintentionally, and that not everyone will always come through... and interestingly enough, it's not always about you. So, you stop lashing out and pointing fingers or looking to place blame for the things that were done to you or weren't done for you. And you learn to keep your Ego in check and to acknowledge and redirect the destructive emotions it spawns - anger, jealousy and resentment.

You learn how to say "I was wrong" and to forgive people for their own human frailties. You learn to build bridges instead of walls and about the healing power of love as it is expressed through a kind word, a warm smile or a friendly gesture. And, at the same time, you eliminate any relationships that are hurtful or fail to uplift and edify you. You stop working so hard at smoothing things over and setting your needs aside. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right to want or expect certain things. And you learn the importance of communicating your needs with confidence and grace. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that eventually martyrs are burned at the stake. Then you learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to Say NO. You learn that you don't know all the answers, it's not your job to save the world and that sometimes you just need to Let Go.

Moreover, you learn to look at people as they really are and not as you would want them to be, and you are careful not to project your neediness or insecurities onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and relationships, and that that not everyone can always love you the way you would want them to. So you stop appraising your worth by the measure of love you are given. And suddenly you realize that it's wrong to demand that someone live their life or sacrifice their dreams just to serve your needs, ease your insecurities, or meet "your" standards and expectations. You learn that the only love worth giving and receiving is the love that is given freely without conditions or limitations. And you learn what it means to love. So you stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that "alone" does not mean "lonely" and you begin to discover the joy of spending time "with yourself" and "on yourself." Then you discover the greatest and most fulfilling love you will ever know - Self Love. And so it comes to pass that, through understanding, your heart heals; and now all new things are possible.

Moving along, you begin to avoid Toxic people and conversations. And you stop wasting time and energy rehashing your situation with family and friends. You learn that talk doesn't change things and that unrequited wishes can only serve to keep you trapped in the past. So you stop lamenting over what could or should have been and you make a decision to leave the past behind. Then you begin to invest your time and energy to affect positive change. You take a personal inventory of all your strengths and weaknesses and the areas you need to improve in order to move ahead, you set your goals and map out a plan of action to see things through.

You learn that life isn't always fair and you don't always get what you think you deserve, and you stop personalizing every loss or disappointment. You learn to accept that sometimes bad things happen to good people and that these things are not an act of God... but merely a random act of fate.

And you stop looking for guarantees, because you've learned that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected and that whatever happens, you'll learn to deal with it. And you learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time - FEAR itself. So you learn to step right into and through your fears, because to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophesy and you learn to go after what you want and not to squander your life living under a cloud of indecision or feelings of impending doom.

Then, YOU LEARN ABOUT MONEY... the personal power and independence it brings and the options it creates. And you recognize the necessity to create your own personal wealth. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And a sense of power is born of self-reliance. And you live with honor and integrity because you know that these principles are not the outdated ideals of a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build your life. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful opportunity and exciting possibility. Then you hang a wind chime outside your window to remind yourself what beauty there is in Simplicity.


Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you TAKE a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

A word about the Power of Prayer: In some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed, not for the answers to my prayers or for material things, but for my "God" to help me find the strength, confidence and courage to persevere; to face each day and to do what I must do.

Remember this:- You are an expression of the almighty. The spirit of God resides within you and moves through you. Open your heart, speak to that spirit and it will heal and empower you. My "God" has never failed me.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Back to reality

Current mood

 So i have been seriously pretending like i am not in med school. The last time i studied with any kind of serious intent was last week wednesday, before my last exam. Death by hanging. After that exam ended, i crashed big time. I was physically, mentally and emotionally drained. I didn't realize how much it had taken out of me to hold it together in order to be able to study for my exams. I think one of the most difficult things to do is to study when all u want to do is lie down under ur covers and pretend u don't exist. But i held it together and did pretty well on my exams. Thank God for that. I'm verbally off guys till further notice, but emotionally still stuck on one. I feel like i'm on an emotional roller coaster these days. Don't listen to anything i say cos the next minute i'll be saying something else. I should have a PhD in these things by now. It still sucks though.

Since the exam on Wednesday, i have practically lived on Hulu. Thankfully, in terms of school work, we didn't cover much before the weekend, so technically i'm not behind because i have managed a couple hours of studying here and there, but i would have liked a head start on this coming week, especially since we are starting the almighty head and neck in anatomy. Cranial nerves are a nightmare. So back to my hulu experience, i got hooked on Reaper. Come to find out that it's an old show that got canceled last year. Hulu has the whole of season one. I ventured elsewhere for season 2 and the show was canceled after the second season. Why they would do that, i have no idea, but they saved me from myself. I can believe i watched all 18 episodes from season one and 13 episodes from season two in 2-3days. I even dreamt about the show yesterday. It's that bad.

I have decided that i don't enjoy being in med school. I still want to be a doctor and all that but the process sucks the joy out of you. I think it's a miserable life of endless study. Well, for the most part. I was dragged to a Cameroonian picnic yesterday. It was alright. I appreciated the fresh air cos i have been stuck in my apartment. I think i'm borderline depressed at the moment. I wish it was just because i was in med school.

I'm not liking 2010 very much. It has hands down being the worst year of my life, but i'm still thankful because i'm always cognizant of the fact that it could be worse. I'm off to memorize cranial nerves V and VII so i can at least have some peace of mind and pretend like i studied today.

P.S. I just fixed my domain name problem....so this site is now www.nigerianscorpio.com (just in case u need to update ur bookmarks or whatever. It's supposed to re-direct from my previous url.) I don't trust these blogger pple with their unknown issues.
I just noticed i lost all the blogs on my blog list. That was over 200 blogs, no joke. That is why i don't follow blogs cos i just add the blogs i like to my list. I want to flog blogger.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Issues

I'm supposed to be in class right now but i'm too tired to move. Woke up at 6.30a, then went back to sleep. I didn't even know i was this tired until after i got home yesterday and i lay on my couch all day from 1p until 12a when i went to sleep. Now u ask, if you were so tired why didn't u go to sleep earlier? By 9p i was struggling to keep my eyes open, but after watching the second part of the real housewives reunion on bravotv.com, i watch flipping out (love that show) then ventured back to hulu to start watching Reaper. I had to force myself to put my computer down. I have no idea why i was paying good money for cable last year when i can watch shows for free.

I hate living alone!!! The silence is deafening, plus i start to think about stuff i'd rather not, so watching those shows was a good distraction until it turned into punishment.

Anyhoo...I went and got a domain name for this blog yesterday. I figured since i waste money on stupid stuff $10 a year is not a bad idea. So i got it from google Apps, figuring that since it's from them, i wouldn't have any issues. Wrong. Tried switching this blog to the custom domain and it keeps telling me another blog is hosted at this site. I found that other people have had that issue, but God knows i can't make heads or tail of how to fix it. To say i'm lost is an understatement. Funny how earlier in the day i was telling my friend that my TV is set to watch DVDs and i have to idea how to do anything else with it cos i lost the manual. Someone had to even help me set it to watch DVD's in the first place. I keep wondering to myself what happened to all the "simple" to operate TVs.  I think i'm severely IT challenged.

Anyway, if anyone has any idea how to fix this domain problem, pls be so kind as to email me at nigerianscorpio@gmail.com and help a sister out. Na beg i dey, if not i will just be paying for something that i know i will never use cos God knows i have to idea how to go about fixing this. 

I really should get out of this couch and go be productive. Can someone help me explain to myself why i have abandoned my very comfortable pillow top mattress to be sleeping on this old, used couch i got off craigslist for $200. The couch is not that comfortable, so i don't understand. I guess is the living alone thing that's getting to me.

BTW, i forgot to tell u guys someone said i sound more intelligent when i speak then when i write. He has read my blog by the way. I don't know how i feel about that. I actually thought it was the opposite. Anyway, he should know. You guys have no way of accessing that cos i've never put up an audio post. Still not tempted to put one up. I find writing therapeutic.

Ok, i'm off to try to do something productive with my life while my mates are in class. BTW, i survived my first block amazingly well without the help of any caffeine products. Maybe that's why i'm so tired. I've been surviving on God's grace, adrenaline and lot's of power naps (that turn into 2-3hr sleep sessions). Thank God sha! 3 more blocks to go. I can't wait for Dec 17th.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Running away

2 exams down, one more to go! Taking a breather.

I deactivated my rebtel account. That thing was bleeding me dry. It was so convenient too, but i'm not working anymore and i can't be using the little money i have to make calls when there is skype. Plus, i needed to stop calling whoever i was calling. Anyway, as you are about to cancel the account they let you know u can't use the same credit card that you currently have on there if you decide to come back.....i hesitated for a moment then i said good! I was using my main debit card. I have another checking account but that's just for my school loan money cos this dead zone that i'm currently in doesn't have BOA. I can't imagine signing up for rebtel with my "school" checking account, so that should help me curtail my excesses.

Been off facebook for a min now. Went back a couple of times to send some messages to a particular human being. Out of my million million friends only 3 have checked up on me. I have no desire to go back there. I might even remove skype from my computer. I'm running away from a lot of things and my anti-social nature is at an all time high.

Anyway, break over. Back to the books.

Monday, September 6, 2010

SMH

I want to kill those two boys!!!

One called at 4.03am and the other at 4.52am. The first one almost gets a pass cos he lives in Nigeria and he might not have thought of the time difference. The second one lives in Atlanta. I should just strangle him. I bet he was coming back from the club too and decided to call me at that time. I'm not playing with my precious sleep these days.

The first call woke me up and i had to get up from my couch to get the phone. Even though i hadn't spoken to this dude in a year, i didn't take the call. I just wanted to sleep. Foolish me stopped the ringer and went to lie down, only for Mr. Atlanta to call me less than 50 mins later. I was annoyed and put my phone on silent after that. Well, i guess i should confess and tell u guys that Mr. Atlanta is none other than nasty voicemail guy that i decided to forgive recently. Since then i've only spoken to him once. I guess it's the give them an inch and they will take a mile thing going on right now. He's about to be put on lock down, starting now.

From now on whenever i sleep, my phone sleeps too.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Walking away

I have to start trusting that God will TAKE CARE of me. If i did that i know that i wouldn't worry so much about everything because i know he got me.

I know that no matter how much i mess up, how badly i act, God will always give me a second chance.

I pray for healing.
I pray for strength.

I'm done crying over this.

I'm walking away.

Yikes!



I had forgotten how this miserable place was. As i tried to settle down to study last night, i noticed it was cold. I had on a night shirt, so i went and put on a large sweater (gulp), still cold. So i put on jammy bottoms, still cold. Then i put on socks, still cold. Put the hood of the sweater over my head, then the sweater started to itch. Took it off and put my wrapper over my head. It's September for christ sakes, what is it doing being cold?

This apartment i just moved to has "free heat". Ok! My last apartment had free heat and i was blasting 80 degrees all winter last yr. It made me not want to shoot myself cos it got cold!!!! Not canada cold, but COLD!!! Guess what?! This new place has free heat, but come to find out there are no thermostats in the apartments. Apparently, it's central heat?! I don die. I am never comfortable at the average temperature. To make things worse, i left my space heater in Atlanta, but thankfully i have to go home soon for a minute, so i can bring it back with me. My last apartment had covered parking, but it really wasn't a "nice" place. This place is so much nicer, and cheaper (i get a discount for being a med student) but no covered parking. So i will be shoveling snow with the rest of them this year. It starts to snow in October in this miserable state.

It's going to be a longgggggggggg winter.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Emo-hug

I love this picture. Got it off google images. This is what i sent to my friend who's brother passed away yesterday.
I thank God for the gift of life. We are all going to die one day. Nobody gets out of this rat-race alive. I guess when we are able to embrace death as a part of life, then it will be easier to deal with. Easy to say, hard to do.

When we are gone, all that's left are memories and if we are lucky legacies that we left behind. I'm working towards making a postive impact on this generation, and i'm starting with myself first. Funny how i was going to write a post on my metamorphosis, cos i realize i need to make some important changes in my life.

That only constant thing in life is change. I have to learn to embrace it so i don't get left behind. So i'm embracing it and letting it work for me, instead of against me.

I have a goal and a purpose. That's what keeps me going, despite all the difficulities and set-backs i have encountered. What is your goal and your purpose for living? Are you just existing? Anywhere belle face mode? NFAing it all around?

What memories are you going to leave behind?

What is your legacy going to be?

I'm starting slowly and working my way up. Making those changes first within myself. If i can make a difference in the life of just one person, then i think i would have fulfilled my purpose. Hopefully, by the time i'm gone, i would have touched thousands of lives. That's my goal. All this would be made possible, only by his grace.

Ah GRACE! I'm in love with that word, you just don't know.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Guess who!


(FORMERLY) PICTURE OF STING AND A HAND! HOPE YOU ENJOYED SEEING ME. LOL






This is the only way i like this picture, flipped to the left. That's how it was taken too. There are a lot of things i love about this picture, but i'll keep it to myself. Now, guess who this is? Nope! It's not me or is it?

September

Happy September everybody!!! It's going to be a great month..... say amen. Amen!!!

This is my month of metamorphosis.......the caterpillar is going to become a butterfly. Now if i can start this change by getting to the anatomy class i have in less than 15 mins (and i'm still at home) that would be great!

Bye pple!
Hey guys, welcome to my blog. Sit back, relax, grab a cup of coffee and enjoy!

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