Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Confession time

I'm sick! I've been spewing germs all over the place in the guise of coughing or as my brother would say, i've been germinating the place. Anyway, i am crushed and heartbroken. First of all, let me revise my opinion, 34 is not too old for me (I'm going to have to pick an age limit cos someone asked me yesterday). I found out my crush has a girlfriend (i literally felt like i had been doused with cold water when i heard. I had to pull myself together and pretend to be fine). Ironically, he insisted that i needed a boyfriend and offered to find me one (Chineke). Tell me something i don't know. I was disappointed though, but in a way i think i'll enjoy being his friend better than I would have enjoyed being his girlfriend (Yes, i'm just consoling myself. What am i supposed to do, snatch someone else's man? That's bad karma) I like him a lot though, he's a really cool dude.

I have a question for ya. What is the difference btw "would u like to be my girlfriend?" and "Do u want me to be ur boyfriend?"

The last guy i was talking to earlier this yr that had started to make me miserable asked me towards the end of our friendship if i wanted him to be my boyfriend. I told him no. Firstly cos i didn't want him to anymore at that point and secondly because i think there's a difference btw those 2 questions. He didn't ask me if i wanted to be his girlfriend, he asked me if i wanted him to be my boyfriend. What kind of bullshit is that? It was like i was the one pursuing him. When i decided to stop talking to him (in my mind), he sent me a text asking me how i was, and i never replied and i haven't heard from him since then. He never ever once tried to reach me since then. Meanwhile, prior to that when i would call and text him and would get no reply, i would call him AGAIN the next day to make sure he wasn't dead in a ditch somewhere. I guess my decision not to reply his text was the right one cos it proved to me that he was a royal asshole as i was beginning to suspect.

OMG....guys, how u do guys do it? How do u walk up to a girl u don't know and start chatting her up. I saw the most put together, preppy, clean cut, baby faced, pink shirt wearing, shiny shoes, cute ass guy on the train two days ago and i couldn't take my eyes off him. He caught me staring TWICE. I was sorely tempted, but i had no idea how to do it. It must be these raging hormones or something becos i don't know what is coming over me. The guy even got off at the same stop as me. I don't know how guys do it, and i don't envy them but i bet it takes a lot of guts to walk up to a good looking chic and talk to her.


  1. my sista it does, it takes alot of guts for me, but the thing with me is that, if i dont, ill be pondering all my life thinking what if.

    i think a guy asking a girl, "do u want me to be your boyfriend"is sort of like saying, oh poor you, you are lonely, do you wwant me to be your boyfriend"

    doent mix with me, i dont even ask, "you wanna go out for a drink sometime" will do just fine.

    you know the guy you liked, you should have given him enough hints that you liek him, then if he doesnt come over,then hes not interested.

  2. Yay to u for being first. How do u want me to give him hints when he has a girlfriend? I don't like wahala at all.

  3. I'm with you on pursuing a taken man being bad juju. I don't go for guys who aren't available (I may secretly pray for his relationship to end, but that's only when I'm feeling weak. And I may hire a hitman to take care of her but that was only one time and it was a joke! I mean sure it wasn't April fool's day or anything but clearly it had to be a joke, right? *Ahem*)

    What would happen in a romance novel of course is that he'll realize what a fabulous woman you are and before we know it, he's broken up with her and he's with you.

    Ok, with the guy on the train...if he caught you checking him out twice and didn't make a move, even when you got off at the same stop as him, he's lame. Yes, I know it's hard to make the first move (you won't catch me doing it!) but surely you gave him enough hints for him to know that if he approached you you wouldn't ignore him?

    I'm told that men don't even see hints though, so maybe it's not his fault...

  4. this has got to be d most colourful blog i've ever seen in blogville!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ok, let me go read

  5. wow, your blog is really beautiful, my god, ah, bad luck, oh well better luck next time

    i dnt believe in snatching boyfriends...its just stupid, comes back to bite you in the ass

  6. my dear, him offering 2 find u a bf is his 'tongue in cheek' way of saying 'am unsnatchable o, just in case daz wot u r thinking'. i do dat all d time wit bobos i know r interested in me & am saying 'nothing 4 u, buster'.

    as 4 d other dude playinh with English, abeg make him go fcuk himself. nonsense, na so him papa ask him mama 2 marry am; 'would u want me 2 b ur husband?' *hissins*

    abt chyking babes, i think guys r naturally equipped with d liver 2 toast babes. gals may find it a little harder cos of d questions of weda it is 'proper' or weda it's turn d man off. my candid advise, stay away 4rm asking guys out. b feminine, flash him all green lights 2 propel him forward. if it doesn, den count ur loss & move on, aint no shame in dat

  7. I never really thought there was a difference between those 2 questions. Apparently there is. Ah life,love and other mysteries.

    Shey I told u before that I dont think 34 is too old. I think I need to pick an age limit, cuz thus far I haven't..I feel inspiration for a post coming on!lol

    Oh and I call those metro moments: Those times when we spot those FYNE guys on the train and get caught

    Have a great weekend babes. Muah

  8. Do you want me to be your boyfriend? Do you want to be my girlfriend..I dunno, but it seems like he's putting the ball in your court.

    As for walking up to guys? Couldn't help you there babe (really wish I could) I get brain farts when I'm around attractive guys. My motto is, less is more before I open my mouth and say something incredibly, embarrasingly stupid!

  9. Aw heya! The cute ones are always taken….
    Will you be my gf…can I be your bf same difference….
    I don’t envy guys too…..i don’t know how they do it

  10. lol....sting..see as u jsut analyze the guy's means the same thing now. Asking if u want him to be ur boyfriend is the same as asking if u want to be his girlfriend.....u just didnt like the guy. Obviously..if he isnt liking u like that he wont be asking that kinda question...unless he is a dundee.
    As per approaching men.......i dont do it...dont have the balls.
    As per ur crush finding u a so dem dey talk him find u one tachere dude.

  11. Hmmmmm....neva saw it that way. U're so right, there's a difference in both questions. Lolll!!!

  12. Next time you say a guy you fancy, walk up to him and pay him a compliment. Something simple like, nice shoes or is that a Marc Jacobs coat (when you know it came from Target). It can get his attention and alert him to the fact that you are interested and if he's smart (and/or single), he'll start a conversation.

    How does that sound? I know it is hard for us babes to talk to guys but I actually 'spoke' to my hubby first and was engaged within less than a year. And i wasn't even looking. lol! But that is a story for another day. No worries babe, in a few months you will look back at all this and laugh in disbelief. God is faithful.

  13. It's like saying: She is my best friend as opposed to I am her best friend.

    I also agree that going after a taken guy is bad juju. Yours will come.

    I love your casa. Can I rent it?

  14. Where did you get your template from? It's so lovely.

  15. @everyone: Thanks for the advice and comments and for the compliments on the blog

    @in my head: I got my template from

    Ciao guys. Love ur comments.

  16. *sigh* will be alright...
    never thought there was a difference anyways

  17. i know, i wonder how guys do it...walk up to a girl and try to talk...what if she embarasses u...hehehehe.

    am sad mama that ur crush has a girl:-( but dont worry sweetie, God will

  18. Looks are deceptive.

    Look beyond the face.

    I have chased a girl from the salon to her boyfriend's place before I let her go many years ago.

    I believe if you really need her, and she is not married, go for her and do your best to prove your love is better.

    God is always on the side of the faithful and truthful. So follow your heart with your spirit guiding you.

    Cheers and God bless.


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