Thursday, January 13, 2011

Nigerian Women and their expiration date

Back in the day when women were hens, this beast of a man was telling my sister that he cannot date a woman who is older than 23, that anything above that has expired. I didn't pay him any attention because it did not apply to me at the time, but i thought it was odd because this man was claiming 31 at the time (come to find out he was actually 41, but that's another story for another day). Point is, this was my first initiation into the thinking of such species of Nigerian men.

Since then, i have seen many instances of "old" men trying to marry "young" girls. These girls are not the love of their lives! It's not just the regular relationship of older dude with younger chic. No! I'm talking of these guys in their 30s specifically targeting chics that are 10 years or more younger. I don't understand it, so that's why I have brought it to you guys attention so you can please tell me why before i slap somebody by mistake. Can you imagine someone telling me that i should not let life teach me a lesson just because i said i wasn't ready to get married anytime soon? I guess my marketability as a Nigerian chic is reducing with each year that passes and i get older. I was discussing this issue with a friend who was in a relationship where the dude was 10yrs older than her and the only reason we could come up with is that maybe they want someone that is so much younger than them so that they can mold and shape this chic to their liking. In order words, be able to be the lord and master in the house and have absolute control over her. I don't know if this is the reason! Maybe they just want a trophy wife and be able to brag about her.

I just want to understand why. I mean, wouldn't it be reasonable to look for someone close to your age? What would someone in their mid thirties have in common with a 19 year old? I know it's not all white and black but my issue is with the Nigerian men who think that any woman above 25 year old is too old for them. I'm surprised that these species of men still exist in this day and age. No wonder all these small, small girls in Nigeria are in a rush to get married. Everywhere i turn, X has married, Y has married, Z has married. If i knew the marriage industry was going to be booming in naija like this, maybe i wouldn't have wasted my time going to med school. I should have gone to be a wedding coordinator or something.

Anyway, if you people know these men, warn them o and help me ask them which bush they were created in.


  1. I have never felt more unconcerned about what age I get married. Nigerian men can shut the fuck up and go suck some dick.

  2. lmao@ "which bush they were created in."

    Hell if i know what the reasoning behind their foolishness is. I would say tho, that while i have this about, i haven't actually met any dude with this mindset...

  3. hahah this post kracked me up, but you are so right. Seems everyone is getting married in nigeria. A friend of mine told me he cannot date a babe that is above 30, but 23 now that is news to me.

  4. Lol seen. Didn't even know dating the youngies was the in-thing for Nigerian guys. Na dem sabi jo. Me I've kukuma started looking elsewhere (not really) (but kind of)

  5. I believe Nigerian men have always had the tendency to marry younger women.
    However, while I dont like speaking in generalities; the only new trend I have noticed is young girls are now more concerned about getting married than about gaining some form of financial independence.
    Among my friends, the average age we all got married was 29 - 31. The two that got married at 24 and 25 were an exception.
    However, I now see quite a few of my nieces and female cousins settling down aged between 23 - 26So, maybe female aspiration has changed to - marriage above all things......?

  6. is the age now 23...? thought it was more like 30

  7. well, i think its us women that allow the pressure to be piled on us by our parents, friends and the society.

  8. I think I go with your theory on why some naija men want younger wives. Also there's the thinking that before 23 or so, the girl is still innocentia, both sexually, emotionally and physically (in terms of babymaking et al)

    But I always encourage my sisters to forget some men's warped psychology and do themselves till they're well rounded and ready. The older a woman is, the more self aware and more chances of meeting the man that is suited to her.

    BTW, I have tagged you as a stylish and versatile blogger, more details on my blog.

  9. lolllll.....this is one mean ranting o! sis, i no blame you at all becox i had been at such similar position that i felt like giving the person 'knuckles to chop!*..shiooo!'s purely out of self-centeredness o jare!.

    1}they want *new chassis* after dem done ride other chassis tire!
    2}they want to intimidate & control!
    3}they want to 'show off', just to massage their ego!
    4}they want a 'baby-factory' incase the ultimate male did not come on time as expected!
    5]ha! don't forget the sex!...they want ever young!

    9ja men! patience o!..if not, MANY 9ja women would had been convicted of murder!...*laughing*

  10. I have nominated you for the Stylish and Versatile award.
    Please visit my blog to know what you are expected to do!

  11. It is a control issue, many believe the younger they are, the more submissive they will be. That said, some are affected by what the society has thought them and it has become a psychology issue for them. There is a friend of mine, who has this dude that was dying for her. He was ready to marry her despite the fact that she was 5yrs older but she said no, she would never marry a man younger than her. There is now another friend; he said over his dead body will he marry someone that is even a month older than him. I asked what if you love her. He said that will never happen. Talking about sealing his mind shut already. This age that is just a bloody number seem to be affecting many of us and thus limiting many of us!

  12. LOL.. I don't really see anything in dating/marrying a guy who's 10years older than you or above that is if it's for the right reasons..
    I know men like that exist but as usual,we go jump and pass them na..
    I haven't really met men with such views maybe it cause I'd finish them with my mouth!
    In tune with your views..

  13. yeah. the rush for marriage esp among our young ladies is quite alarming. and the high rate of marital discomfort (lol)is sure the end result. gurl sufering in silence and DOOM is the word.

    i have issues with age difference o. 10 yrs or more older is a NO NO for me.

  14. I think parental pressures have a lot to play in this. Mothers now pressure their daughters right from university, so any chance of her seeing any marriage opportunity, she jump at it. Its d in thing now. First time here, nice blog.


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