Thursday, March 24, 2011

Is he your father?


My response: Are you her father?

Apparently, my friend told me that the reason i'm thinking that way is because i have been out of Nigeria for a while. I don't think i have been out that long but still, I don't understand these chics who are dating an average guy, non-baller status and yet expect him to do all this. Maybe it's just me but i think it takes away from your self-dignity when a guy starts to take care of you on that level and you are not even married (or engaged).

If you are working, explain why a guy will give you money for hair, make-up, shoes, bag, clothes, transport fare, etc etc What are you now using your money for? Everyday cannot be christmas or your birthday. I'm not saying that you shouldn't expect your guy to treat you, but for the basic necessities you should be able to handle business and stop giving Nigerian chics a bad name. Everywhere i go, all i hear from dudes in Nigeria is how materialistic chics are. If the dude is on baller status, that might be a different story because he can afford to do all of that, even then you shouldn't let him see you finish by going to him with your every need.

Is he your father? What do you think is going through these guys minds when you are making all these demands? I don't know sha o, maybe i'm from a different planet but i just think there should be a little (or more than a little) self pride when it comes to asking for stuff from guys. Na those kind moves dey bring see-finish, at least in my opinion. I've never liked that song by Styl plus "If you go, who's gonna buy you clothes, who's gonna load your phone......etc"  I was taken aback the first time i heard it. So chics cannot afford to buy their own clothes or load their phones in naija anymore? See fuck up. Na wa sha.

Before anyone says it's because i'm not in Naija, i don't think it has anything to do with that. No one said i was rolling in money over here. I am a classic case of a broke medical student. I'm roasting on most days but i'm very comfortable, can pay my bills, get all my necessities and from time to time i can treat myself because i don't have long throat. I live within my means. If i see something i like that i can't afford which is most things these days, i put in on my mental wish list for whatever year i can afford it. I don't think most Naija girls who do this crap live within their means or their parents means. They want to be styling and profiling on someone else's dime. It irritates me because at the end of the day, we are all lumped into materialistic, gold diggers.

If you know you are guilty of this sin, try to try, you hear. Get some pride and while you are at it some shame too. I just had a dude tell me yesterday (actually the person who posted this status) that he cannot date a chic who cannot provide the basics for herself. It rubs him the wrong way when she wants money for hair and make-up and stuff like that. Can we at least try to do those for ourselves?

Thank you. I appreciate that. I still love you though. Muah!

P.S. I wrote this post during my spring break before i watched blackberry babes. In the movie, Tonto Dike responded to a dude (don't know his name) who asked her why she can't buy the blackberry Torch herself,  by saying "How can a fine girl (or is it babe) like me be paying for my own stuff". Is that the mentality behind this? If it is, then that would explain it. So if you are a hot, happening chic, you shouldn't pay for your stuff? I'm curious..............

Help me out here.


  1. Sad to say, that is the dumb mentality on most Naija babes head.

    Black berry babes is just a classic representation of some babes, even though a little bit exaggerated.

  2. haha!! I don't even know how girls can tax their dudes like this. I've never done it- i think i would die of shame if i did lol. Honestly, i think the guys are thinking 'once i get her for sure she's repaying me in kind mehn' lol


  3. Mehnnnn....Thank God I am not the only one who thinks this way. shewshh.. most of my friends in 9ja are like "so what did your man buy for you this week"... nothing ooo... hahah.. is everyday christman? must a guy "BUY" something to show his love. I tire I swear...... It's more annoying when you try to explain to pple that you dont need a man to buy you things n they are like" it's because ur father is blahblah".. who cares who my father is? it's called self pride. if you can afford it, buy it your damn self, if you cant then live within your means. no be everybody fit maintain gbogbo bigs girls lever.SMH.. this is why some 9ja girls choose to run with aristo, so they can maintain a status that isn't necessary.

  4. madness. this is why idk if I can be w ur run of the mill naija girl. tufiakwa!

  5. I just read your blog and even though your blog name scared me, I must say this.....I agree with Madame Sting....Ladies....where is your dignity????????? Even if the guys are that silly (which trust me, they are not) why must you think so low of yourself? You are waaaaaaay better than a bb! Way better,

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  7. ...all na effizzy....dem wan represent.....
    some na peer presure.....
    some na just sheer insatiability....

    ev'ry one wan feel among....make e no b like say na der own bad pass..... d guys sure d r getting smth close to d equivalent in kind....

    some pple damn d consequences n just flow with d moment!

  8. lool! u sound so pissed.. pele!
    i personally dnt feel comfy even when a guy pays for my meal. It's jst not my thing..i like "feeling" independent.
    but to seriously demand that a guy shld buy you stuff is jst wrong and shows u'r jst a needy banshee. where art thou pride?lol

  9. this is just backwards mentality, but forget movies n look closer, this trend is fast changing, times are harder, i'm certain this would change drastically soon. but ur right its shameful behavior

  10. for 9ja?..USAI!!!! Tonto dike has said it #gbam!# & if someone preaches this to babes, they would say the person is cheap! Hence, dudes prefer the small small secondary school gals when dating, then when they want to marry, go to the church or find a working class lady in her 30's who is ready to settle down fast. OR groom the secondary babe until they marry her. That is why you see this materialistic gals wreck havoc on matrimonial homes!

  11. Uhhhhmmmmmm. Nice one, but firstly, I don't think you should say this is the case among 'most' naija gals. I think the word 'most' is taking it too far. maybe 'some', but certainly not 'most'. And for those 'some', you will realize that they are dropping 'a lot' physically for those guys, which you might interprete as 'prostituting' themselves in the name of a relationship.
    It takes two to tango, if the guys find it very hard, they should revolt, and all the 'nonsense' will stop. I, certainly don't do it, and don't have friends that do. But I think gals that do it and just plain greedy, materialistic, discontented and incosiderate.

  12. BBB was hilarious menn its sad to see that some naija girls actually behaves like that.

    The girl depending and dragging guys stuff I don't get it at all. But sadly this is not only happening in naija o I had an ex-roomate/friend who get everything from ipod to phone bills, rent and etc and to top it off a two year ex still pays one of her phone line...

  13. dt blackberry movie is so unrealistic. I refuse to believe that naija chics act or live lyk dt!

    If it is...MSCHEW!


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