Monday, September 23, 2013

The devil be using me, son!

I really should go to sleep. I feel like the devil be using me* sometimes. My body would appreciate the early bed time but no! Everyday, after a futile attempt to study for one reason or the other, i give up and sit on this chair, ruminating like an old goat. I feel like less of a human being than i did when i first started med school. I am startled when I get compliments from random strangers usually in the hospital. I got on the elevator the other day and this older guy told me i was gorgeous and looked just like his girlfriend's daughter. Last month, I just finished jabbing this lady with a depo shot, and she was nice enough to tell me that i was very pretty. Talk true. She must have a high tolerance for pain or maybe she's a masochist because i felt anything but pretty or gorgeous or whatever. I feel like a corpse half the time and how i look is the last thing on my mind but i do appreciate the unexpected compliments because even though i don't feel like it, it reminds me i am alive.

 The worst thing anyone can ask me is how school is going or say happily, yay, you are almost done. Shey, you will invite me for your graduation. I just want to smack them. I just feel so irritated and annoyed.

I would like to push the pause button on life and just hibernate for a long while. If i had to do this over, i wouldn't. I would have accepted the non existent offer of that stinking rich, money dripping down his shoes, Alhaji and become a 9th and last favorite wife. Made! Instead i chose to have a brain and wanted to use it for something other than frying garri. Biggest mistake of my life.

I really don't know what i am doing up at this time. You see what i mean by the devil be using me? You see it?

*I guess i now speak broken american english aka ebonics? because i can't for the life of me translate that into proper english. I need to visit Nigeria and go brush up on my English. Isn't that ironic? lol.


  1. LMAOOO...Yay, you are almost done!!!! :***
    You should post a pic so that we can be better judges of your looks, whaddya think?!

    1. Don't act like u r not my personal person and we don't see every night at that Which pic do u want again?

  2. So how is school? *dodges stones*

    You really must be pretty to get genuine compliments though considering i was actually scared for you at some point going by the way you describe yourself here; hair falling out, weight loss, inadequate sleep and well, my imagination filled the blank spaces :)

    1. I don't hv power to stone u today and pls the way I describe myself still applies. Don't be deceived, u don't know whether those people have eye problems or something or they c how pathetic I look and want to give me hope. Save a soul one compliment at a time.


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