Monday, November 30, 2015

Chei

Today, I was just minding my business o, walking past a Nursing station when a PA loudly asked
"Do you guys think NaijaScorpio's hair is real?" I slowed down and responded "Maybe it is, maybe it isn't" and he said "It's so shiny". I was like "hey, you can never tell with a black woman's hair" and kept walking away. There were at least 5 people in that nursing station, all white of course. I walked to my computer and was trying to make sense of what just happened. Was i embarrassed or offended? Should i make it a thing or just overlook it? I really didn't know what to make of it. Then the guy who is actually really nice and friendly, actually comes over to meet me and was like "Is it really your hair?" And touches my hair!!!! He's like "is it how it naturally is?"

Mind you, I wear a wig! It's a short wig which looks pretty much how my hair was before i stopped perming it. I actually have been dealing with alopecia since 2012, which is why i shave my head from time to time. But i am not about to be telling this Man this in freaking public. So i tell him, i have a perm. He's like why didn't you tell me, it's genetics and this is naturally how your hair is?" Then he's like, so is your hair really curly and i said yes, really tight curls. He's like you should wear it like that. Then he's like, don't mind me, this is just hair envy, while pointing to his bald head.

While i decided not to be offended (what's the point?), this dude was freaking offensive and oblivious to life! My wig is short and nothing out of the ordinary. I swear it looks exactly like my permed hair which was "shiny" after i got a perm. If I wasn't BLACK, would he question for a second if that was my real hair? Loudly, in front of people. Chei, I've suffered. Before my hair started falling out (thanks med school), I never wore a weave or wig and hardly braided my hair. I went to the hair salon every 4-6 weeks, wrapped my hair every night and loved it.

But regardless, even if this was my first choice, why is it okay for some white man to question the authenticity of my hair so comfortably. He is so lucky that not only have I mellowed out, It was in a professional setting. I've gotten so used to being the only black person around in most settings, I don't remember I'm the only black person, until shit like this happens. I worked 10 hours today and was in the hospital for a total of 12 hours (the last 2 hours spent gisting ) and I only saw 3 other black people the entire time. 2 were cleaners and one was a patient, just to give you an idea of how "diverse" this city is.

It's okay, Wig, we will be fine. Forget the rude man. In my past life, I probably would have slapped him when he came and TOUCHED my hair.

8 comments:

  1. Ahhaaa, it also happens to my girls. Whenever they have a new hairdo, their classmates will ask if it is their real hair! Sometimes they just go duh! And they like touching their hair whenever they take afro to school, they like the bouncy feel.
    Hmm, it is real 'diverse'. in that your clinic o! :D

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    1. LOL...I was in the hospital when this happened but my clinic is no better. The diversity is very diverse. LOL

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  2. Blessings....
    excuse my language, bloody rude and he needs to keep his hands to himself and not take liberties. Over a PA system you say, down right offense i'd day, what if you took to the PA system to ask if his "balls" are real and then cop a feel? How'd you think that would go down?

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    Replies
    1. NO, he was a Physician's assistant (PA), but he might as well have announced over a PA because he was addressing everyone in the nursing station when i was walking by.

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  3. i hate when people touch my hair. Once i styled my hair (#teamnatural) nicely and wore it to church and this lady kept asking, is this your hair? i said yes. i guess my answer didn't satisfy her as she proceeded to touch my hair. i was pissed. I don't go touching people's hair so don't touch mine without my approval.

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    1. I don't get it. My co-residents stylishly do it too. Before i came to this place, nobody have randomly just touched my hair and head like they seem to do here. I can tell they are trying to tell if it's really or not.

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  4. I had a similar experience with a patient and after he asked he turned red and apologized but i realized he was genuinely curious and interested so i just gave him a 101 lecture about braids and weaves. Some i think are just facinated because they are not used to it and it's something different. I went to a remote place (no tv, internet...) in Benin Republic with a team. Everyone else on the team was either caucasian or asian with long hair. I remember the kids coming over to touch and play with their hair. They were all so fascinated by it. Some of the grownups we met did the same thing too and they were okay with it. My team mates only complaint was the pain they were having because some of the kids were taking turns trying to braid their hair. The only time any of the kids touched my hair was when i asked them to help me take my braids out.

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    1. That's different from loudly asking everyone (not me), other white people of they thought my hair was real. That's just inappropriate and completely cuts off any interest i might have in enlightening him about black hair.

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